rivercityvibe   “Puerile, smutty, schoolboy nonsense” – My Mom

I cannot believe we have not had Elisha Cuthbert, yet. She is right up my street…. type-wise.

nice.......

Continuing the theme, it might interest you to learn that Ms. Cuthbert is from Calgary, Canada, hey?

Gemma Atkinson, of course. What she lacks in style and grace she more than makes up for with….rack.

Not a German

Gemma is a Brit – an ally of ours whenever the Germans get restless. It’s nice to have non-German hottie for once. To balance the Bundchens and the Klums.

The usual source tells us,

Since 2006, she has appeared in FHM’s 100 Sexiest List, debuting at number 32 in 2006; following her appearance on the cover of FHM, she moved up to 23 in 2007; and in 2008, she rose again to number 18.

Now she has been featured in Something for the Weekend she can confidently expect to improve her ranking.

In the interests of fairness, and to balance our references to her as a gender-traitor, a coward and a brainless idiot, here is a picture of a smoking-hot Tyra Banks.

Now I remember.....

Tyra, if you’re reading this, this is what we mean by being FAIR. Everyone gets an even chance. Even you.

It’s Frau Klum again (sounds like a Bond villain). This girl never puts a foot wrong. Prost!

In her undies.

The lovely Miranda Kerr. In her BeeBee......

Interesting fact about Miranda Kerr? First Australian Victoria’s Secret model.

This is Danneel Harris. Two interesting points to make here: 1. She will be 30 years old on the 18th of March. 2. Her parents were illiterate or drunk when they filled out her birth certificate.

It is spelled D-A-N-I-E-L-L-E, fuck-knuckles.

Thirty? Congratulations are in order.......

I should point out that this pic is from a 2008 Maxim shoot. I’ve always liked Maxim. I get it when I can’t find the New Criterion or 2000 AD.

This is Valeria Mazza, in her absolute prime.

Congratulations

This is a young lady who is mother to four children. There names are weird: Balthazar, Tiziano, Benicio and Taina, but with an ass like that, we’ll forgive her…….

Have a good weekend, y’all.

I was lying in bed this morning, early, drinking tea and watching E!, when I noticed Teri Marie Harrison, a young lady who had hitherto managed to slip below my radar. She’s a former Playboy Playmate and is married to the one guy, from Sevendust.

Here she is (below) presumably modelling Uggs:

Yes, it's SFW. Don't be such a prude.

That was actually the only SFW picture readily available. The usual source tells us more about her:

Her involvement with Playboy began when her best friend encouraged her to send pictures of herself to the magazine. Although she was chosen almost immediately as a Playmate, it was a year before she was assigned a month. She was also the German Playboy Playmate of the Month, for January 2003. According to Teri, her father is German and her mother is Japanese^.

German. As per usual. It’s almost a relief…….

Not two weeks ago, we had the lovely Bar Refaeli featured on this very website, under “Something for the Weekend“. Now look at her! Front cover of Sports Illustrated‘s 2009 Swimsuit Issue!

Tastefully done.

Apparently, however, we are not the only ones involved in giving this young lady’s career a boost. Her boyfriend, who goes by the made-up Shakespearian name of Leonardo DiCaprio, has also been exerting his sinister influence. Radaronline tells us:

Rumor is Refaeli’s honey, actor Leonardo DiCaprio, had something to do with her getting the yearly top honor. The claim is that DiCaprio pushed for Refaeli to tick off former girlfriend, Gisele Bundchen.

Why do they write like that, by the way? It’s like baby talk. Though they redeem themselves by going on to coo, amusingly:

But how she got there hardly matters. The pictures of Refaeli are every man’s fantasy and every woman’s refrigerator diet aid.

And a reminder to wax.

A special treat for you, this week. This picture is what those of us in the business call a “scene” – a picture that uses background and scenery to hint at a story or create an ambiance. It involves the use of “properties” or “props” (noticeably, in this case, a couple of pineapples).

The model is the indescribably beautiful Jessica White.

At least I think it's a pineapple

Jessica White hails from Buffalo NY – a place that’s already in my good books for being the ancestral home of chicken wings.

The usual source tells me that:

In 2003, White was chosen for a coveted shoot in Sports Illustrated‘s famed Swimsuit Issue. She was also featured in the 2004, 2005, 2007, 2008 and 2009 issues….. She holds the distinction of being the only Sports Illustrated Swimsuit model to appear on the cover in a body painting although only as an inset.

Not many people know that.