rivercityvibe   “Puerile, smutty, schoolboy nonsense” – My Mom

One of the most popular posts EVER on rivercityvibe was a two minute effort for me – a simple cut and paste from youtube of that one guy from SNL’s brilliant “I’m on a Boat”. Forget the fact that I spend hours coming up with hilarious comedy of my own, the drink and drug-fueled drafting, editing, redrafting. Evidently the rivercityvibe faithful prefer their pleasures out of a can.

It’s a metaphor for our times.

Anyway, we have featured a capella before, too. Here we combine a capella with “I’m on a Boat”. Watch the girl who takes T-Paine’s part (her name is Anya). She’s on the right of the screen, ill-advisedly wearing red jeans. We’ll discuss her in a minute.

So the girls name is Anya. I was going to say something dryly amusing about her posterior. But then I realized I was entirely cool with it. Partly because it’s just not that bad, and partly because….you’ve guessed it haven’t you? At least in this, she looks like rivercityvibe favorite Lindsay Lohan. And that is the biggest compliment I can give basically. Seriously, Anya. Never change.

I’ve just checked the acquire website (scroll down eight people). Tell me she’s not a real Ginger. We all know what that means.

It means beware.

Andy Samberg, the genius behind “I’m on a boat” – the curly haired one who looks like a horse-  has been selected to host the MTV Movie Awards.  Good choice, MTV – he is very, very funny. Here’s Jack Black and that one guy from Superbad making the announcement:

As I recently noted, in our River City, we never go too long without boarding a boat of some sort. I even go out to eat by canoe, on occasion. It’s like Waterworld, here. Everyone needs some kind of waterborne mode of transport simply to survive.

With that, I want to introduce you to possibly the best music video we have ever posted on rivercityvibe. It basically sums up the reason why I live here. It’s Lonely Island with I’m on a boat:

(it’s that ‘rap’ deal so there’s bad language. Mainly ‘motherfucker’ but also ‘shit’ used as a synonym for “everything” as in “and shit”. Also the phrase “I fucked a mermaid” which I found particularly amusing):

I feel the lyrics deserve some attention:

Aww shit, get your towels ready it’s about to go down (shorty, yeah)
Everybody in the place hit the fucking deck (shorty, yeah)
But stay on your motherfucking toes
We running this, let’s go

I’m on a boat (I’m on a boat)
I’m on a boat (I’m on a boat)
Everybody look at me ’cause I’m sailing on a boat (sailing on a boat)
I’m on a boat (I’m on a boat)
I’m on a boat
Take a good hard look at the motherfucking boat (boat, yeah)

I’m on a boat motherfucker take a look at me
Straight flowing on a boat on the deep blue sea
Busting five knots, wind whipping out my coat
You can’t stop me motherfucker cause I’m on a boat

Take a picture, trick (trick)
I’m on a boat, bitch (bitch)
We drinking Santana champ,
Cause it’s so crisp (crisp)
I got my swim trunks
And my flippie-floppies
I’m flipping burgers, you at Kinko’s
Straight flipping copies

I’m riding on a dolphin, doing flips and shit
The dolphin’s splashing, getting everybody all wet
But this ain’t Seaworld, this is real as it gets
I’m on a boat, motherfucker, don’t you ever forget

I’m on a boat and
It’s going fast and
I got a nautical themed
Pashmina afghan
I’m the king of the world
On a boat like Leo
If you’re on the shore,
Then you’re sure not me-oh

For more click HERE.

And I’m with you. In Riverside, Avondale and Ortega, a nautical themed Pashmina in de rigeur…….